Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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