What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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