If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
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