Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Randomize
