Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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