Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Randomize