lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
