Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize