so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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