i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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