Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
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