giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
