Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
May the power of my ass compel you!!
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
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