wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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