VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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