There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Randomize
