STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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