i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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