dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize