put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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