It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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