my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
