The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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