You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
