I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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