So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
