remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize