last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
