So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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