Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
