Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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