were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
