it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
