But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
