PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
