my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize