If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
