Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
