Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
