And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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