She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
