you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
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