I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I will pee on everything he values.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
