At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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