i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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