Just mADE A PArabola og urine
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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