eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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