whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
