He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
