Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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