after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
